Yes, this is another FREAKING OUT entry regarding marriage. Before this I wrote similar one with different problem here. Now the problem is from my family side.
Yesterday I had a chat with my friend which is happen to be Mr Red Ribbon's friend. It was just a normal "hi", "how are you?", but later on he asked questions regarding me and Mr Red Ribbon's wedding plan.
He probably heard of how my family is. A story that my parents were never 'okay' with my boyfriend in the past. At one time I thought of being single for the rest of my life. That was before I met Mr Red Ribbon. The last 'give up' I had was at July 2007 and I will never forget about this. I finally can forgive everybody involved in the incident (alhamdulillah) but I still can't forget how my family wanted me to stop seeing my 3-y.o-in relationship boyfriend and asked me to marry a guy I barely known and just met up for once for dinner with my family.
I should've closed the book. It's just... this reminds me of it...
So my friend was asking me if my family is okay with Mr Red Ribbon. And the answer is "don't know yet". It's like gambling when you feel like you almost win and for the last dice you throw, it says YOU LOSE.
I told myself everything will be fine. Just to make myself happy.
And one thing he said that keeps running on my head was:
"ciannyer you berdua..."
Kesian? Is it? Then I started to think... WHAT IF... yea WHAT IF the thing happened in 2007 happen again now? Looking at my parent respond, they are okay with the family meeting on this coming December.
But up to now my family haven't shown any preparation or sign of how exciting they are for the December meeting. What if my family want to meet up just to scold Mr Red Ribbon's family?
Asytagfirullah, I betul2 taknak negative thinking.
But the trauma scares me a lot.
I've been trying to see some changes happening in my family. Been trying to be positive seeing my dad was so busy thinking on when is the wedding day and where it should take place. And he look okay now after he retired. But I will still feel so scared until the day comes on this coming 3rd December for the family meeting.
He probably heard of how my family is. A story that my parents were never 'okay' with my boyfriend in the past. At one time I thought of being single for the rest of my life. That was before I met Mr Red Ribbon. The last 'give up' I had was at July 2007 and I will never forget about this. I finally can forgive everybody involved in the incident (alhamdulillah) but I still can't forget how my family wanted me to stop seeing my 3-y.o-in relationship boyfriend and asked me to marry a guy I barely known and just met up for once for dinner with my family.
I should've closed the book. It's just... this reminds me of it...
So my friend was asking me if my family is okay with Mr Red Ribbon. And the answer is "don't know yet". It's like gambling when you feel like you almost win and for the last dice you throw, it says YOU LOSE.
I told myself everything will be fine. Just to make myself happy.
And one thing he said that keeps running on my head was:
"ciannyer you berdua..."
Kesian? Is it? Then I started to think... WHAT IF... yea WHAT IF the thing happened in 2007 happen again now? Looking at my parent respond, they are okay with the family meeting on this coming December.
But up to now my family haven't shown any preparation or sign of how exciting they are for the December meeting. What if my family want to meet up just to scold Mr Red Ribbon's family?
Asytagfirullah, I betul2 taknak negative thinking.
But the trauma scares me a lot.
I've been trying to see some changes happening in my family. Been trying to be positive seeing my dad was so busy thinking on when is the wedding day and where it should take place. And he look okay now after he retired. But I will still feel so scared until the day comes on this coming 3rd December for the family meeting.
Pray for me, friends...
I pray to the Al-Mighty and hope Ms Red Ribbon will be my last resort...
I'll be 30 next year and hope people can give me a chance to have a family and beautiful children...
3 comments:
hi miss rbb..seems like we have the same problem..and i also decided if my choice now will not approved by family..means i wanna be alone for the rest..its hard n hurt n so tired ..coz i think this is the only perosn that i admire that fulfill my bf's characteristic dat i wanted to. if this is not the fate..i think i will just stop there,,if my parent wanna see me have a happy family ..just let me married with my guy. i just keep praying hope they will accept him..i will always remember my bf's thought: don't give all ur luv to me..reserve urself a bit coz u don't know whats gonna happened in future..if somthing bad happened ..at least u still can control urself and can accept all the things..just keep praying dear..allah will always be with u..try to console ur parents..
darling, you have to keep trying, especially if down inside your heart saying that he's the one. try again. me also still trying and hope this is my last time trying, will try to do anything (positive things of course) to make my family's heart melted.
will keep on updating on what's going on and hope for the best for my life and also yours, dear...
keep supporting each other yea :)
yeah..keep supporting each other..do da best for our self,,pray for us k..
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