Friday, July 15, 2011

Wedding Prep: Kenduri Kahwin Nampak Membazirkan Duit? | 8 days left


Alasan... Ya memang alasan...
Kenduri kahwin zaman sekarang memang xmacam kenduri kahwin zaman dulu.
Kenduri kahwin kat bandar tentu la lain dari kenduri kahwin kat kampong.
Tapi kenduri kahwin kat kampong pon sekarang xnak kalah dari kenduri kat bandar, nak gempak juga, nak grand juga, ape2 la...


Ramai orang cakap,
BUAT APA HABISKAN DUIT BANYAK UNTUK KENDURI NIE?
MEMBAZIR JE, BAIK SIMPAN DUIT TUE UNTUK MASA DEPAN.

Well, that was my first thought of my wedding...
Argue ngan parents bukan setakat satu kali dua kali, ya Allah, hampir tiap2 hari.
Di awal2 perancangan budget kahwin, saya pon dah banyak kali cakap, buat la yang wajib menurut agama, buat kenduri kecik je janji semua orang tahu yang kita nie dah rasmi berkahwin...
Tapi, bukan itu yang ada dalam minda parents.
Which I really opposed them at the first place.

Masa my brother nak kahwin, dia baru je habis belajar dari oversea.
Cari keje kat Jakarta susah nak mampos, eventho u are oversea grad.
Keje2 yang ada ye keje freelance je...
Nak kahwin??? Nak... Usia dah lebih dari 30.
Pasangan dah dapat dah...
Tapi, apa yang ada? Belum punya apa2...
Nak biarkan parents kuar duit banyak2 pon cam kesian gak.
Arguing with parents? Memang la...
My brother nak kawen kat penghulu je, bayar Rp 250,000 (RM75) untuk duit administration, bagi mas kahwin satu set alat sholat (telekung, sajadah, etc) tambah cincin. Settled.
Mom and dad said, "Mana ada orang kahwin macam tue je? Kne wat kenduri."
My experience now, pegi pejabat agama nak kahwin pun bukan RM75 tapi lebih dari RM700 kan?
Ok gaduh2 la started from that point on.

As a sister, saya nak menghargai calon bini abang hari tue.
Takkan abang xbawa hantaran untuk calon istri dia...
So, me and my sister pon busy sumbang barang2 untuk hantaran, dari kasut, beg, perfume, toiletries, baju, semua la...
Then mom pon siapkan satu set jewellery sebab alat sholat tue xboleh jadi mahar, ustad cakap perempuan tue kne ada harga, bukan maksud alat sholat tue xada harganya, of course ada harganya, lagi untuk mengingatkan istri akan Allah senantiasa, tapi mahar tue something yang kita bole simpan as harta bende, untuk harga 'membeli' perempuan tue.
Dari situ je, dah mulai la ada hantaran.
Saya pon xsetuju ngan kahwin yang habiskan duit banyak, tapi apa perasaan family perempuan tue yang anak dia diambil suami, dibawa keluar dari rumah tapi anak dia 'xdihargai'.
Itu je yang ada dalam minda hari tue, coz I sayangkan my sister in law.


Then mom and dad told me how happy they are, anak sulung nak kahwin.
Dah habis belajar, tengah cari keje, insyaallah dapat keje bagus.
Dahtue nak kahwin gak...
Berkaca2 mata diorang ucapkan rasa syukur tue.
Nak sangat berkongsi kebahagiaan, buat satu majlis kenduri kahwin.
Eventho dah ada kenduri kat pihak perempuan, tapi nak juga buat kat lelakinyer side.

Kenduri? Bukan habis RM5k - RM10k.
Tapi nak macam mane lagi?
They were so excited yang diorang fikir money doesn't matter.
As long as parents mampu, they will happily dan sangat ikhlas arrange kenduri tue.
Coz the kenduri here (at my place and environment) was actually not a celebration of pengantin.
Tapi celebration of how proud parents nak menghantar anak dia ke step berumah tangga.


Saya rasa, selain pengantin kat tengah tue yang kat tepi kanan kiri tue mungkin lagi hepi.
Mom said to give her one last chance to make their son and daughter happy, at least for the last time sebelum anak2nya hidup secara independent.
Kalau dah berumah tangga, parents pon nak involve apa2 pon dah xboleh.

So that is what happen with my perkahwinan.
I argued with parents too at the first place, just as my brother did before.
But I know, my wedding not only mean a lot to me but also parents.
My parents said, my wedding should be as meriah as my brother's at least coz first daughter is the most important in the family.
Mom said, she will be happy if I let her to make me as happy as raja ratu sehari on my wedding day.
She said, when she sees me happy, she'll be so happy too.
Ow that's so touching, mommy...
Thanks a lot.

After all these days, my wedding preparation, I know I can't afford to pay all this.
Probably, to other people my wedding is nothing, but for me this is a lil bit too much.
What can I say?
Semua pemilihan vendor (in terms of budget) mom yang pilih.
What I did was, I prepare whatever I can prepare myself.
And whatever my parent's side yang kne siapkan, I'm trying to lower their budget.
Kne save kat sini, save kat sana.
Finding alternatives for them so that they won't spend too much.
But with output yang sama...
She doesn't want to talk about numbers, but she will try her best, if dia xmampu pon dia akan cakap kalau xmampu.
Then whenever she said so, I try finding other ways/stuffs yang lagi affordable.

I love you mom...
Sorry sebab tak pahamkan apa yang mom rasa selama ini.
Mom cakap when I have a daughter nanti, mesti saya akan rasakan perasaan ini yang akan berusaha memberikan yang paling terbaik untuk anak saya nanti.
She's my wedding organizer,
I'm just her vice president.

Dari 600 kad jemputan tue, kawan and family kat KL 10 kad je.
While me, bagi kat kawan 5 kad je.
The rest are my parents' guests.
So, I will dedicate this resepsi for mommy too.
And from mommy to me too.
Thanks, mom

:)


PS: Every wedding ada makna sendiri2 dari tiap family. When someone said my wedding (seeing from my wedding prep) is too much, I just feel so sad. You try experience this yourself. I was against all this before, but when everything comes ikhlasly from your parents, as their final wish for me, I just couldn't say No.
Thanks cik or encik Anon... 



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